Bad Mama Day

Let’s cut to the chase.

Any other mom’s out there with multiple little ones ever feel like they are living in a trench? You keep digging and digging and digging, but never really see the light at the end? It’s dirty, it doesn’t always smell good, and you are never clean? And the work never seems to lighten or give way? You feel abused. And like all you ever do is shout orders, no matter how many times you tell yourself to be calm, collected and all that stuff? Yeah. Today, I had one of those days.

I think as moms we all have our ups and downs. Today, we had a lot of downs. Mouthy and backtalking 3 year old who would not listen to save her princess doll’s life. Baby who has become very viscious over the past few weeks….biting, scratching, yanking hair, pinching (hard!), drawing blood, screaming. Baby who wakes right as I’m going to bed at night, as well as overnight. 5 year old who repeatedly disobeys and instigates fights and injuries. Baby who napped only 1/2 of her regular time, and you could tell. 3 year old who only napped 45 minutes. 5 year old who didn’t nap, and desperately needed one. Baby who screams at the top of her lungs if I get more than 5 steps away from her. No joke. Sticky honey water spilled all over the carpet after I just said to make sure it didn’t get spilled. The endless fighting. And crying. The gluesticks stuck to the carpet. The incessent crying when I announce it’s bathtime. Complaining about what they get to watch on TV for the 10 minutes before bathtime. Yelling as G repeatedly runs with scissors (really?!). Hearing ‘we’re not hungry’ after I just spent 2 hours making dinner. Using a new cup every single time they want something to drink *pet peeve*. Breaking up fights.constantly. Clothes torn off the clothesline defiantly. Running around screaming like a maniac (them, not me). Refusing to buckle their seatbelts (guess what? car doesn’t move without them buckled). Losing the pacifier again.and.again. Throwing water balloons at heads when I just said not to. Dirtying 3 pairs of clothes apiece for no particular reason.

After I got all the kids to bed tonight I was trying to finish cutting up a ham that I had started around, oh, noon. I sliced right into my finger and blood started gushing. %&*@!*$. That’s it. I’m going to bed. I glanced at my phone and read a post on one of my Catholic moms groups about how this mom wanted prayers/advice…the mom had just shouted and yelled at her toddler, hit a ‘mom low’ and broke down crying. I thought “I hear ya, girl. Right there with ya”. Only I wasn’t crying and just wanted a shower!

I always see this family at church that has 7 kids. I think that is awesome. The kids are well behaved, nice looking and the family seems to be overall happy. Granted they are older than mine, much older. Honestly, I would love to be that family some day, in some way. Then I have a day like today, and I wonder how the heck I am ever going to get to 4, let alone 7. Some days I feel like I lose the energy or light to parent 3. Then some days I feel like I got it goin’ on and I got this mom thang’ like nobody’s business.

When I have a day like today, I usually feel dumb about it (if G or L were listening, they would be correcting me, because ‘dumb’ is a bad word in our house…whoops). Like really, is there nothing else worse in the world than your 3 year old mouthing off or your infant rabidly scratching your arms to pieces? Of course there is! We all know that! But I still feel like my feelings are valid, no matter how insignificant in the world. So, I try to take it in stride. And really, I should be thankful for those 3 wonderful blessings that we have been entrusted with raising. I think of all the families that wish for children so badly, and cannot have any. And then the baby wakes up screaming bloody murder. *sigh*

Any other moms of multiple littles with me? If not, guess I’m just crazy. And it’s totally possible πŸ˜‰ I guess we all have our good and bad days, and the good usually {hopefully} outnumber the bad. I enjoy my kids to no end and will love them forever. But some days, are just not good mama days.

Thanks for listening. I just needed to vent. Now I’m going to bed πŸ˜‰

-The {hair pulling} Costellos

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